Godzilla, King of Cardboard

Alex Howe

“Godzilla, King of Cardboard”

 

            As the dawn broke upon the suburban sprawl where he now resides, Godzilla begrudgingly awoke at the beckoning of the novelty alarm clock his kids got him for Father’s Day last year. He had a few minutes to reflect on these mornings, overcast skies outside the window and likely a little chilly that day, but nothing his thickly scaled skin couldn’t handle. He did have to make sure his daughter Brayleigh didn’t take her flip-flops to school again, though. She loved those things and insisted on wearing them at all times, even if her toes turned blue in the snow. His son Kreston was in the middle of a growth spurt and probably would be a bit of a bear when Godzilla had to wake him up, so Godzilla decided to make a real breakfast with eggs and bacon and toast to help Kreston out and give him some protein to start the day. Maybe the boy’s mood would improve by the time school ended and his mother picked the kids up from school. Damn it, why do these Mondays always hurt the most?

            His ex-wife Gretchen was a good co-parent and they’d luckily been able to smooth some things over once she remarried a year after the divorce was final. She’d taken nearly everything from him in court. The battle had been ugly, and their daughter had only been an infant. Gretchen wanted full custody with no visits, the car, the house, and a king’s ransom for alimony payments. She got all of it, a full Yahtzee, on account of Godzilla’s reputation in a life that now seemed eons ago. He understood why it worked for her to leverage his youthful enthusiasm for the destruction of Japan’s metropolitan skylines all those years ago, and the judge had been sympathetic to her assertion that the kids may not be safe in the sole supervision of an ancient fire-breathing kaiju. As sad as it was to watch her get married to local real estate magnate Morris Theodore Rasmussen in the backyard of the home he used to live in (a mortgage Godzilla had still been on the hook for), he was hesitantly supportive because the man had positively impacted her and rounded her sharper edges. Apparently, Big Mo – a nickname he gave himself – got through to her and helped her to see that Godzilla was still the kids’ father and needed to be part of their life. This point had convinced Godzilla to see what was truly important in the blended family dynamic: working together for the betterment of the children. They hadn’t reconciled, however. They were cordial and sometimes they invited him over for family dinner, and he never forgot a decent bottle of red wine to arrive with.

            But Godzilla couldn’t help but sulk on these Mondays as the warm shower washed over him. He missed them when they weren’t at his place. The empty apartment seemed cold and gray without anyone to come to or speak with. He was sure that he’d probably just get home from his shift later, change into his sweats and then microwave the movie night pepperoni pizza for dinner. Maybe some channel surfing would help him find something fun to watch, but probably not. So, he reached with his arm to the bar of soap and continued to clean up so that he could wake the kids with enough time to get them to school with some level of punctuality. As Godzilla got out to dry off, he caught his appearance in the bathroom mirror and noticed how he’d aged. A few scales on his head had molted away, one of his dagger-like teeth had dulled and chipped on a hard candy. His mid-section was no longer the fearsome core of power he’d once sported decades ago; it was now a testament to his peaceful outlook.

            During a classic rampage of his back in December of 1974, Godzilla looked down from hundreds of feet above the city he was decimating and suddenly felt the anguished screams as something other than confirmation of his dominance. He felt their suffering, he heard their anguished cries among the rubble that had once been a city. Godzilla had begun to soften at first when the humans had gone to war with each other in the 1940’s. He had watched back then the way that people could be so willing to shoot bullets at one another and had been nearby when the United States had dropped those horrifying bombs on Japan. Godzilla had shrugged it off until that day in ’71, delusional that he wasn’t like those humans and that he couldn’t help it if his power made him destructive. So, on that day, Godzilla vowed to make an active and purposeful change. He would be the pinnacle of monster dominance no longer, if it meant that he no longer caused others to be in pain.

His first effort was to surrender to the scientists who had been trying to communicate with him and understand him. Over several months, they’d housed him on one of the smaller Hawaiian Islands and worked to teach Godzilla the English language so that they could all talk to one another. He had become peaceful, truly tranquil, and he gained their trust. Over time, Godzilla established that he could be rehabilitated and treated for his aggression. He’d learned to read, to communicate and understand not only the words but the emotions of other people. Godzilla had found the peaceful impact Gandhi had made on the world to be compelling, and one of the scientists had invested time into Godzilla’s personal growth by reading philosophy and poetry to Godzilla during the long hours in the lab spent testing the monster’s blood and physiology. He wanted to be part of society. He heard the term “average Joe” and wanted to be just that – average. Part of this was that he wanted to be their size. However, the doctors saw potential in his natural size and power and knew that he could get great job opportunities with it. They developed two complimentary and potent pills for Godzilla, one to make him man-sized, and one that allowed Godzilla to be his original size. Both medications worked like blessed magic, and Godzilla entered society as first example of the integration of the monsters into civil society. From there, he worked on a construction crew, and he met Gretchen on the job when she was hired as office manager for the crew’s firm.

            Eventually, Godzilla had made a mistake during the assembly of a skyscraper when a butterfly landed on his nose while holding a 10-ton steel girder. He sneezed and lit the beam ablaze before fumbling it directly above the site foreman. The poor man hadn’t seen it coming, and his survival was impossible. When the wreckage cleared, Godzilla wasn’t charged with any crime, but the foreman’s wife nearly bankrupted the construction firm in the wrongful death lawsuit. Godzilla was summarily let go for his negligence. The loss of this job was not only infamous in the city, but Godzilla’s unemployment had been the first domino to fall in the dissolution of his marriage. He became depressed about the death even though it had been an accident. The relationship turned to a miasmic bog as the lovers became nothing more than ships passing in the night. The fact that his spiraling mental state had dovetailed with her desire to have a thriving home life had caused the two of them to begin bickering whenever they weren’t drifting apart. Gretchen was right to leave.

            Godzilla’s morning routine went well from there, and before he knew it, he’d gotten himself ready for work and the kids were finishing their final pieces of bacon on the way out the door so he could get them to school. He had focused in on enjoying their presence this morning, and muscle memory had carried him to 7:30 and Kreston and Brayleigh might even be a little early for class for once. He slowed his used Toyota a bit as the school came into view, just enough for a couple extra moments so that he could memorize their faces in the rearview mirror. He steeled himself to say goodbye to them at the door and mustered enough cheer to convincingly wish them a good day at school.

            As he drove away, he refocused himself for a busy day at the store. Godzilla was decked out in his maroon polo shirt and khaki slacks. He was an “associate” (this was the title for all of the bottom-rung employees at the company and fairly condescending to the workers) at the nearby big-box retail chain Bullseye, known for their dartboard-like logo and all-maroon branding. Godzilla arrived at the parking lot on the side of the Bullseye building and got out of the mid-size sedan so that he could trudge inside, clock in, and arrive to his station outside the back of the store. Godzilla was the only member of the team who worked outside and whether it was rain, sunshine or snow he could be found out near the recycling area toiling away. After that fateful sneeze, Godzilla had wanted a change of pace and a lower-risk responsibility. Bullseye had presented an opening on Indubitably.com for what they tabbed a “logistics efficiency specialist” and he jumped at it. As fate would have it, that meant he was solely in charge of all incoming and outgoing shipment boxes.

            Godzilla felt mostly disappointment every day that he trudged through the doors of the store and shuffled to the break room’s far door where the payroll clock was located. Godzilla was entering his employee identification number so that he would be on time when he heard a familiar voice behind him. As Godzilla turned his head, he spied the cheerful face he had been hoping for. Her name was Harriett and Godzilla’s bright spot of each day was having her for a co-worker. She always seemed to know exactly when and how to deliver an encouraging word or a genuine compliment in a way that broke through his doldrums. She ran the stock room and often created the pile of shipping refuse Godzilla disposed of, so the two of them saw each other often throughout the day at Bullseye. Because Godzilla had to take his largeness pill after he arrived at his station by the back door, he was never able to eat lunch with any of the rest of the store’s team in the break room. Godzilla worried because he knew they would sometimes mock his change of status in the world. He’d once been a king. No, he’d been a god, but now he was the box boy. While Godzilla never heard their conversations, he knew what they all thought of him. Except for Harriett. Knowing that it was medically dangerous for him to take more than one of each pill in a given day, she would sometimes go outside to eat lunch with Godzilla and talk to him like any co-worker might. They would chat away between bites of cold cut sandwiches or leftover Chinese takeout.

            Godzilla took a liking to Harriett and she to him, and soon their coworkers took to ribbing the two of them about being “work wife and work husband”, whatever that meant. Godzilla had an inkling that he and his best friend were being mocked, but he didn’t care so long as she didn’t seem fazed by the jabs the other team members took at the two of them. Her warmth overcame any childish nonsense the others could drum up to embarrass them, at least in his mind. It bothered Godzilla that they seemed mean-spirited about it, but Harriett’s philosophy was always that “if people want to talk, let them stay busy with it”. He followed her lead about that, even though she’d previously mentioned some incidents of mean-spirited teasing from her relationship past that suggested this kind of thing bothered her. Eventually, they had confided in one another that they really did like each other and maybe they both wanted to go on a date outside of work instead of just being lunch buddies.

            “Look, Zill (her own special nickname for Godzilla) – working with you for the last couple of years has been fun, and I was hoping…maybe… that you…” Harriett stumbled over her words, trying to land her thought as though it were a fragile aircraft. “...That maybe we could hang out outside of work and we could eat dinner together or something because we only ever eat peebee and jays out back of the building and I like you a lot” Harriett spat the sentence out rather than saying it, and the sweet bulldozing of her words on that day last week had been like music to his ears.

            Godzilla had nearly choked on a swig of water when she’d ambushed him. “Uh, yeah!” With a cough, Godzilla thumped his chest once or twice to recalibrate himself before replying more clearly, “I’d like that very much, Harriett, I like you too.” He’d suggested Monday evening for their dinner out and she’d gleefully agreed before both of them parted ways for the rest of that day, though Godzilla was convinced he’d heard her squeal in delight when she though he was out of earshot. He’d grinned and mostly hadn’t stopped since then, a fact that his kids had given him a hilarious and good-natured roasting for over the weekend. But now it was Monday and as Godzilla turned and saw her, she blushed and simply said “Hey Zill, we still on for tonight?” Godzilla felt his heart skip once but kept his cool in front of the handful of other people in the office and smiled at her long enough to say “You bet, Harry (Harriett hated her full name, so Godzilla called her Harry for short). I’ll pick you up at 6:30. Better get to work, I suppose.” She smiled back at him before turning to her colleague and blushing.

            Godzilla turned back to the time clock and finished entering his employee identification number. To Godzilla’s surprise, instead of the normal display of his name next to the punch time, the screen displayed “King of Cardboard”. He was not amused and knew precisely who would think that this rude little prank was funny. The head of the store’s human resources, a portly person named Chris, was not a fan of Godzilla’s presence on the Bullseye team and constantly took great pleasure in mocking Godzilla’s fall from grace. Admittedly, having to acknowledge his own history as a walking weapon of devastation and abandon his dominance of all other monsters had tarnished his well-worn reputation. Godzilla wished to leave his infamous past behind, however, and with folks like Chris poking at him and picking the scab open once more it felt like the world was rejecting him all over again.

Godzilla steeled his control and focused his energy on the idea that this Monday would be a great one. He just knew it would be. He had his date with Harriett later after work, of course, but today was also the day he had been hoping to move up in the Bullseye team’s structure. Godzilla had been working diligently for more than 2 years now in his position behind the store, and as the sole reason why this store was the most efficient in the company when it came to waste and recycling costs as well as logistics spending. He knew his value and kept his nose to the grindstone. The store had even been able to eliminate their monthly waste management bill by being able to simply burn all of the compacted trash and cardboard instead of sending it to a landfill, which had been a fantastic boon for the profit-and-loss reports the store’s head manager would be reviewing ahead of their meeting that morning. Godzilla was convinced he’d finally be approved for the position he’d proposed to create, Waste and Logistics Efficiency Team Lead. He felt that he’d made an effective case to the lead manager that being a living compactor and incinerator carried enough value for a pay raise from the 18 dollars per hour he currently made and good enough health benefits to put his kids on. Today was his day.

Shrugging off the mean-spirited prank from Chris, Godzilla went to his locker to grab the pill that he’d take to become his natural size once he was outside. For a moment, Godzilla thought about the scientists who’d developed the complimentary medications that allowed Godzilla to live something of a normal life. While no science that was currently available would be able to make him human, the medication options available had allowed them to make pills that could help Godzilla to be human-sized. There was one fading taboo left regarding their integration, as some of the angrier people in society still held on to the idea that kaiju and humans should not be together in romantic or marital relationships. Godzilla had encountered the ire of some very narrow-minded people when he began dating Gretchen years ago, but these voices were becoming fewer and quieter with the passage of time.

Most of the other kaiju and ancient monsters who inhabited the planet had elected to join Godzilla on his path to peace and had been prescribed for these medications. Now, some of Godzilla’s oldest rivals were productive members of society. Ghidorah had even become part of a state governor’s economic advisory board! Times had changed, but one of Godzilla’s former enemies had resisted the changing of times.

The other kaiju had begun to make inroads with world governments in order to smooth over the damage that previous rampages and intra-kaiju conflicts had caused. The United Nations had eventually met with Godzilla and other prominent kaiju and welcomed them as citizens of the world. While many of the kaiju had experienced a limited-but-warm welcome to the world’s communities, Mothra had become angry and spiteful about the peace movement within the monster community and disappeared after a meeting with a few of the kaiju who had tried to talk him into reconsidering. Mothra had been loudly unreceptive and eventually had stormed off from the meeting, flying quickly into the atmosphere and out of sight. Mothra had felt that the size pills were a plot to poison the dominant species of the planet, but the rest of his kind had gotten the distinct impression that Mothra simply resented Godzilla for leading the way on a great idea. Mothra had established a self-published newsletter back then to decry the way that the kaiju community was betraying its own roots or to sling conspiratorial mud about the pharmaceutical science behind the size-control medications.

Ironically, most of the following the newsletter garnered was from humans who were very nervous about this societal change, a sentiment that persisted despite Mothra’s disappearance from the public eye. Mothra’s jealous nature when it came to Godzilla’s accomplishments had since resulted in the kaiju not seeing their former contemporary in decades. Most assumed Mothra had simply left the planet forever, not to be seen again. A few believed that eventually Mothra would rejoin them, and they could repair their relationships, a hope that Godzilla still held for his oldest battle opponent.

Godzilla went out to his area behind the store, where a pile of cardboard had already collected haphazardly at the placement from the rest of the Bullseye team. He took his pill and grew to his natural height at nearly 400 feet and began to plug away at the pile so that it was reasonably small when he would eventually breath a small amount of napalm from deep within his chest and set the pile ablaze. Godzilla did enjoy being able to expel his natural abilities daily instead of holding it all at bay and bottling himself up. He’d not been so relaxed and clear-minded in his life as he’d become as a Bullseye team member. Despite the smell of burning trash, this area was his own version of a Zen Garden and Godzilla tended to it with precision and tranquil detailing. After a couple of hours, Godzilla heard on the walkie-talkie that the store’s lead manager was on her way outside to have their scheduled meeting.

Godzilla moved himself away from the piles of burning trash to spot where they could talk and straightened out his work shirt in preparation. He wanted to be presentable when he got this promotion. The lead manager arrived outside, with one unpleasant surprise in tow: Chris was with her and their clipboard, which meant this meeting was off to a bad start. The lead manager informed Godzilla that Bullseye had not approved his proposed position, nor had they approved his request for better health benefits. Chris chimed in at this point to let Godzilla know the good news, which they facetiously revealed to be a 10 cent-per-hour pay increase. Chris smiled their garish plastic smile at Godzilla, knowing Godzilla would have to accept the result or risk being seen as something other than a team player. Godzilla responded with an utterly defeated “Ok, thank you for considering the other proposals anyway,” before he signed the form to accept the paltry and token insult to his hard work. As the oblivious lead manager smiled and turned to walk back inside, Chris paused for a minute and stayed back to get in one final verbal dig.

“The Mighty Godzilla, King of Cardboard!” Chris began to laugh as they finally followed the lead manager inside. Godzilla was crestfallen, his hope for better things dashed by office politics once again. Godzilla resolved to not let Chris’s antics ruin his day completely, but he did feel it deep down and found it tough to smile through the rest of the morning. For the first time, Godzilla felt a little chill in the morning air as a sudden gust of wind blew through the area. He hadn’t even realized a tear had formed until the gust had dislodged it from his eyelid and forced it to trickle to his reptilian cheek. He felt a bit of the old anger flicker inside but stuffed it away again. He would not have all of these years of personal growth and agreeable interaction with people undone by some pencil-pushing HR rep with a bad attitude.

Just before lunch, a call for Godzilla came in over the walkie-talkie. It was Harriett, but she sounded quite worried instead of her usual self. “Zill, there’s a call on the line for you and they said it’s urgent. I think it’s your ex.” If Gretchen was calling him at work, one of the kids probably got into big trouble at school and she was over-reacting. He sighed because it was probably just one more bump in the day’s road. When they patched the call through to him, Godzilla calmly said “What do you need, Gretchen?”

“The kids, Godzilla – he has the kids, and I don’t know what to do!” Gretchen’s wailing plea was a new and very scary sound to Godzilla’s ears. Over the years he had heard every form of Gretchen raising her voice, but this was new and if Godzilla had hair on the back of his neck it would be standing up. He began to try and reason with Gretchen just enough to understand the situation and find out who had the kids and why.

“Who has our children, Gretchen? What is happening? You’re scaring the hell out of me!” Godzilla did his best to stay composed when his ex-wife was clearly unable to be. Though it seemed like a panicked eternity, his firmness in asking for more information paid off after only a couple of minutes. She replied that Morris hadn’t represented himself honestly, and Godzilla’s reptilian blood ran colder than usual.

“Morris got the kids out of school in the middle of the day and took them home, he told the school there were dentist appointments and lied. He’s here at the house and he looks messed up, like his face is twisted and contorted. He’s screaming that the only person he’ll talk to… Oh God… He’s demanding to talk to you, or he says he’ll hurt my babies!” Godzilla snorted and a brief burst of flame and smoke escaped as his mouth snarled at the news. “Godzilla, please, you have to get down to the house right now because I don’t know what he’s going to do!” Gretchen hung up hastily.

Godzilla resolved in that moment to move swiftly toward the house and waste no time. Harry’s voice came back on the walkie talkie. “Zill? You there?” He’d seen red and nearly acted without thinking but the sound of Harry focused him back on the reality of the situation. He needed to leave work and couldn’t just go trudging off through the suburbs and risk crushing homes and businesses along the way.

“Yeah Harry, I’m here. I have to get to Gretchen’s and deal with what you just heard. I’m sorry you had to hear all of that.” Without hesitating for even one moment, Harry offered to help him. “Zill, do you need a ride? I don’t want you driving while you’re this stressed out and upset. Take your other pill and clock out. I’ll go let the team lead know that you’re taking a personal day and that I’m taking you home. Meet me at my car.”

Godzilla was still angry with Morris’ sudden betrayal and very worried about how to protect his kids, but now realized how close to undoing his new legacy he’d been for a moment. He was thankful for Harry. He took his smallness pill and moved toward the door to go inside and clock out. A few minutes later, he was getting into Harry’s car and about to head for the house. He gave Harry the address and she put it into the map application on her phone. As they took off, Godzilla was silent and stared out the passenger-side window. Harry broke his tunnel-visioned focus.

“Zill, are you going to be alright? I’m worried about you; I know those kids are your whole world.” She was so genuine and compassionate about it all. “Are you going to call the police?” Godzilla hadn’t even thought to call in law enforcement and now realized he needed to do exactly that. He processed her words and how she was treating him.

“Harry – thank you. I’m sorry you had to hear all of that. Yeah, I’m going to call them right now.” He pulled out his phone and gave her a quick look before dialing 911. He explained what Gretchen had told him and that he was heading to the house now, hoping to ensure personally that Morris didn’t hurt his children or his ex-wife. The dispatcher on the other end of the call got the address from Godzilla and let him know that officers would meet them there in a few minutes. The dispatcher also told him to not go inside the house until officers arrived and cleared him. He thanked the person for taking his call and hung up. He turned to Harry and answered her question.

“Harry, I really hope this turns out alright. I think I’ll be fine, but I have to stand between Morris – or whoever he really is – and my kids. I can’t believe I ever trusted him around my family!” Godzilla’s words were somber and quiet, coming from one of those emotional places that only fathers understand when in a protection mode. He wasn’t about to let this other man do any harm to anyone. He’d done his own harm in this life and was unwilling to let it return to visit his son and daughter.

Harry drove the rest of the way in silence with Godzilla next to her. As they approached the house, they saw two black-and-white police cruisers parked outside Gretchen’s house. The officers were gathering their weapons and donning their armor when Godzilla exited the car. He identified himself as the emergency caller and gave them his ID to confirm who he was. He quickly explained to the officers once again what the situation was, and they turned the loudspeakers on from one of the cruisers so that they were ready to communicate with Morris from outside the house. Two of the officers began to go from door to door on the street to let neighbors know that they needed to stay indoors and away from windows, just in case. After several minutes, Godzilla was standing with one of the officers and at the ready to speak with Morris through the cruiser’s speaker system.

The officer pressed the button to speak and identified himself to Morris and that they only wanted to talk. “Nobody has to get hurt today, Mr. Rasmussen. No one wants that. Come on out of the house and we’ll talk, okay?” It was at this moment that Gretchen came running out of the house. Her face was streaked with mascara from weeping, and she was visibly distraught by what she’d heard. She had a message for the officers from Morris.

“Wait, no! He wanted Godzilla and he’d going to hurt my babies; he has a knife. Oh, my sweet babies! You made him even angrier by not giving him what he wants!” The officer cut to the chase and asked what Morris wanted. “Him.” Gretchen pointed her shaking finger at Godzilla. “Morris only wants to talk to my ex-husband. Anyone else, he says he’ll do something awful.”

The officers tried to talk Godzilla out of giving the man what he wanted. They did what they could to get a protective vest onto him, but none were big enough. Godzilla assured them that he’d been shot at before and bullets bounced off his skin like drops of water. Internally, he knew it had been a very long time since he last took one of those bullets, and he wasn’t sure if a knife would be better at slipping between his scales. Suddenly the day’s sadness and difficulty seemed like a distant memory, replaced by genuine worry for everyone’s safety. The officers looked Godzilla in the eye and knew that there was no stopping him and that the situation was only getting worse the longer they delayed Godzilla from going inside.

Before he started inside, Godzilla looked back over his shoulder to Harry’s car, where she still sat in the driver seat. Her hands were clasped as though she was in prayer and tears were coming down her face. She was concerned for her best friend. Her willingness to stand by Godzilla gave him hope that everything would be alright, even if he wasn’t completely sure. He began to gingerly step toward the front door, the small group of officers and loved ones watching nervously from the street behind him.

Godzilla entered the house and a fleeting thought about the irony of crossing this threshold into danger clashed with the blissful memory of carrying Gretchen over it years ago after their honeymoon. The light diffusing through the living room curtains showed that the living room was empty except for the couches and throw pillows. Godzilla called out to Morris. “Mo, where are you? Can we talk? I’m worried about you, buddy. This isn’t like you.”

“I’m in the kitchen, Godzilla. Glad you could finally make it!” Morris didn’t even sound like himself as he yelled from the back of the house. “Get on back here! Now!” Godzilla gingerly walked in the direction of that kitchen, barely containing the anger he was feeling and wondering why all of the lights were off. He felt something was familiar about all of this but couldn’t place it.

“I’m coming around the corner, Mo. I got my hands up. Now where are my…” As Godzilla rounded to corner, he saw Morris holding the knife and standing behind Kreston and Brayleigh. “…Kids!” The two children exclaimed “Dad!” before Morris barked for all of them to shut up immediately. “Mo, what do you want with me? Why are you bringing the kids into this?”

“Godzilla, look at me! Right in the eyes, look at me and tell me what you see!” As the kids sobbed in fear, Godzilla examined Morris’ face. Gretchen was right, his face was twisted, distorted somehow. Even his posture seemed wrong, like it hurt him to be standing, but there was something about it that Godzilla felt that he’d seen before. It was like a nightmare had become real and he couldn’t quite place it. “Don’t you remember your old pal¸traitor?”

There it was. Godzilla knew what he was seeing. Morris’ eyes had changed. They weren’t human anymore. They looked compound, the many lenses of a bug. Morris seemed hunched because there was no spine in him, only an exoskeleton. This person was one of his own, a kaiju – but how? No, it couldn’t really be. Not him, not today.
            “Ah, now you see me. You know who I am, Godzilla. Say it!” Godzilla’s brain sped up and put it together. Mo, Morris. Th, Theodore. Ra, Rasmussen.

“Mothra.”

“There it is, kids, your dad recognizes me, I knew it!” But Godzilla couldn’t understand how it was possible. He was a man; Mo didn’t even have wings like Mothra. He had hands, and a jaw, and… how could a moth have become a man?

“Mothra, what did you do? How are you here? You’re not well.”

“I’m fine! I’m... fine. I suppose I look a bit different than when you and the others tried to talk me into changing. I vowed that day to hurt you for how you talked down to me. You think you’re so special and holy for lowering yourself to be with the humans. Disgusting.”

“I wanted to be at peace. I didn’t want to kill or destroy anymore, Mothra. I’m not like that, like I was when we were younger.”

Mothra took a deep breath. “Listen, I knew that I wanted to hurt you. I wanted to take something important away from you the way that you and the other kaiju took my right to be dominant away from me. I know you beat me sometimes, but at least I wasn’t subjugated to these puny mammals like you all wanted! And I blame you most of all, Godzilla. I watched you from afar, in the upper atmosphere where you couldn’t see me. I watched for years as you built this cute little life you wanted. I couldn’t stand seeing you pretending to be happy while working for other people. I know it messes with you not to be the king you used to be. Admit it!”

Godzilla didn’t like admitting it, but there were moments when he missed the feeling of raw power. Being responsible to no one but himself and seemingly free back before he knew better. “Everyone wishes sometimes that certain things could be like they used to be, Mothra! But the good old’ days weren’t that good! We used to hurt people! You’re trying to hurt my kids right now! My kids, man!”

Mothra slammed a fist on the counter before pointing the tip of the knife at Godzilla, yelling. “You have no idea how much it sucked for me when you all turned your back on me! Do you see how much pain I’ve dealt with to fit in enough with your special little people? Don’t you think it pained me to have my beautiful wings clipped off like toenails, all so I could wear shirts? The surgeons I found to do all of this in secret did a bang-up job, didn’t they? Only the best to change my features and make me look like a human.”
            “Mothra, that shouldn’t be possible. These doctors won’t operate on kaiju at full size…”

“You’re exactly right, ‘your highness’! You got your way anyhow and I took the smallness pill just so I could have all these surgeries and mess up your life from right under your nose! I stole your wife, I help parent your kids, and I live in your old house! I tried to take everything from you, but you’re such a damn goody-goody that you’ve been making it all work somehow! I can’t stand it!”

“Mothra, why would you mangle yourself? You used to look so wonderful and majestic, you can’t really have done all of this just to hurt my kids. What did you really want?”

“You don’t get it, do you? I should have been their leader! You were the most destructive of all of us, you crushed more cities and caused my earthquakes and tsunamis than every other kaiju combined. Why did you get to lead us into peace, too? It should’ve been me! So, when I left you all behind, I wanted to leave behind being a kaiju. It made doing all of this easier. You wanted to play at being a human, I just made for a more convincing fake human!”

Godzilla took it all in and realized that he and the other kaiju had done a poor job of considering how Mothra felt when their dynamic with the rest of the world had changed. They had been so sure that they were right that their desire for progress had drowned out the voices of others with different perspectives. They’d been compassionate in the least compassionate way. Godzilla then did the hardest thing he’d never considered doing.

“Mothra, I’m sorry.” Mothra was stunned by the admission. Godzilla noticed a moment of softening in Mothra’s face, maybe enough to get Godzilla through to him. “I thought we were doing the right thing… nah, scratch that, I thought that I was doing the right thing when I tried to talk you into changing your whole life the way that I was changing mine. I talked a lot of our kind into that chance, and I was wrong to assume you’d see everything the way I wanted to you. I was condescending and you clearly feel insulted by what happened. I’m sorry, from the bottom of my guts I’m sorry for how I handled talking with you. But please, don’t hurt my kids, they didn’t do anything to you. You don’t have to do this.”

As Godzilla apologized, Mothra focused all of his attention on the rival he had come to resent so much. Godzilla had slowly lowered his right hand, which was now very close to a nearby light switch on the wall. Mothra spoke up, and through sobs began to respond to Godzilla. “Y-you can’t m-make it all okay now, you b-bastard. My l-life can never be the same, and I’m a fr-free-hee-heeek! Y-!”

With Mothra focused solely on him, Godzilla quickly ripped his hand down over the light switch and the fixture overhead lit up brightly in the dim room. Mothra’s revealed eyes, without the human-like contacts he’d disguised himself with, immediately fixated on the light source long enough for Godzilla to yell “Kids, run!”

Kreston and Brayleigh scrambled to their feet and sprinted out the door to their mother and the police officers. Mothra’s attention on the light broke and he was once again furious at the trick played on him. He lunged at Godzilla with the knife, and Godzilla dodged to the side as quickly as he could. A slight stinging barely registered in Godzilla’s mind as the world slowed down in his mind, becoming something to react to. He tackled Mothra to the ground and got the knife out of his hand just as the sound of the front door slamming wide open was followed by several pairs of feet rushing inside. An officer yelled at the two of them to freeze, and Godzilla released his grip. As quickly as their fight began, the police ended it.

Mothra was arrested and taken outside to an awaiting police vehicle to be taken off for charging and booking. As he passed Gretchen and the kids, he saw their confusion and anger and only hung his head, saying nothing before the police guided his head into the backseat. Godzilla was sitting on a gurney being examined by emergency responders. They discovered a small bleed on Godzilla’s rib area where the knife had failed to stab him but had still popped a scale free rather painfully. Applying rubbing alcohol, they were dressing the wound and chatting with Godzilla when Brayleigh ran up to them.

“Daddy!” she yelled and hugged her father around his neck, Kreston a moment behind and walking up. Both of them still seemed a bit shocked, and Kreston simply wanted to make sure his dad was alright. “Do you feel ok, Pop? Looks like you’ve had better days.” Godzilla knew that Kreston would deal with the day’s events by using some humor and was testing the water with his comment.

“Yeah, buddy. I lost a scale, but I’ll be just fine. Right?” He looked at the EMT as he asked, eliciting a smile and nod from the person applying the bandages. “See, just fine.” Kreston fist-bumped his dad and then picked up his sister off Godzilla’s neck.

“We’re going to go check on Mom. She’s pretty shook by all of this.” Brayleigh added a “Love you, Daddy,” and the two of them looked at their father with slight grins as Godzilla said “I love you both so much. Go to your mother and I’ll see you later, alright?” They smiled bigger and turned to walk across the yard to where Gretchen was speaking with the police. She looked over to where they were coming from and mouthed a “thank you” in Godzilla’s direction. He nodded and looked around to take in the sight of it all.

In the light of the setting sun, the blue and red flashing lights of the police cars and ambulance coated much of the outdoor scenery. These lights framed the one face Godzilla most wanted to see as she walked up to check on him.

“Hey Zill. Seems like you’re some big hero now.”

“Oh no, just doing what any father would do to keep his kids safe. I think.” He smiled at her. “I’m sorry we didn’t get to go to dinner like we wanted to. But, um… thank you.”
            “Thank me? What for – all I did was drive you here? And don’t worry about dinner, I’ll take a rain check if you will.”
            Godzilla smiled and replied “If it weren’t for you, I’d have stormed off and proven Mothra right about being a monster. He wanted me to admit he was right, and you talked me down. Thank you.”

Harry smiled back at him and the EMT moved to the ambulance door to put some supplies away and give the two of them some space. Harry took his hand in hers. She looked Godzilla in the eye and said “You know, I hate that nickname Chris has for you. King of Cardboard. What a jerk. He doesn’t know how special you are. I’m starting to see it more all the time.”

“Thanks, Harry. So, what do we do next?”

“Dinner next week?”

“How about sandwiches again at lunch tomorrow? I don’t think I can wait until next week to see you again.”

Harry just laughed and hugged Zill. He was warming to the shorter version of his name. She made him feel like a king.

 

 

 

THE END.